Talking About Social Isolation

 

Talking about Social Isolation tends to start arguments

By Kendall Worth!

I have previously writtenabout "social prescriptions”. If we had a social prescription program available in Nova Scotia, it could help address social isolation. In that article, I talked about an existing social prescription program in Ontario, whicj I was reminded of, following conversations, this week. 

Recently, a welfare recipient told me that his anxiety is through the roof and is out of control. He told me that he is approaching having to present himself at an emergency department, for his increasing anxiety. He does not want this to happen. He worries that even asking for help can have bad outcomes, explaining that someone had previously called 911 because he had threatened to commit suicide. This has not happened to him in 10-12 years, but, this is what happens when people are socially isolated for so long. He knows that a prescription program to combat loneliness and social isolation could help. He is not there yet, at present, but worries that he may not be able to control his thoughts and feelings and may end up:

#1 - Checking himself into Emergency (ER)  just to have some human contact.

#2 – Fear of someone reporting him -- e.g. calling 911 to report a suicide threat/attempt.

Thankfully 12 years have gone by since the last time he was ever seen in the ER for either of these reasons. Still, he knows the process well enough for him to know and understand that getting seen for either of those reasons will not help him. Experience has demonstrated - to people who show at the ER for social isolation or because someone “said” they were suicidal – that it does not result in any appropriate referral. Staff are mostly unsympathetic and once they determine that your problem is not medical , are always dismissive, and too often not even sympathetic. The system is stressed and they are silo-ed into their professions. Isolation, lack of friends and social activities is not seen as their responsibility and that is the issue – it is no one’s.

In the UK, a project using "social prescribing" offers a description of their program: 

https://www.bbbc.org.uk/services/social-prescribing-for-health-and-wellbeing/

He asked me to write an open letter advocating for changes in the process of what happens when you are seen in the QE#2 ER , for social isolation and friendlessness, as well as advocating generally for a program of social prescribing. After thinking long and hard, plus, this week, seeking advice from a social worker and a mental health worker, I decided not to write that open letter. Although I still think social prescriptions could be a valuable program, it cannot solve all problems, or do anything about making and keeping friends, which I explored in this article.

The same welfare recipient, a week after he originally approached me, told me what help he was able to get, through the week. He was still struggling with his anxiety, but said his part time work did help, and he felt better when at work. He also spent time speaking to a social worker, with whom he has a professional relationship but he wishes he had non professional social contacts and friends, that he could also turn to when his anxiety is high. Unfortunately, he doesn't have them.

Even now everyone in the community of people I advocate for, understands the following statements:

#1 – We cannot expect the government, or even an individual MLA to step in and help people repair friendships that have ended. People’s friendships end for a huge number of reasons; plus everyone needs to respect boundaries in a friendship.

#2 – Sometimes we also have to respect that people need their space, for reasons relating to anxiety occasionally people may ignore or “not be speaking to” another friend – there is nothing the government can do make anxiety or need for space go away.

My informant (a welfare recipient) who was asking me to write an open letter to politicians, also wanted me to beg them to do something about people “using their anxiety as an excuse to cancel plans”. He himself experiences the anxiety, and also people cancelling plans for that reason. Sadly, even he himself – an anxiety sufferer – along with others in the community of people I advocate for, believe that people who use anxiety as an excuse for cancelling plans, are sometimes "faking”, using anxiety as an excuse to get out of plans.  Also sadly, people who are part of this community also use anxiety as an excuse to cancel plans, but also as encouragement to socially isolate themselves. However, people who actually live day-to-day taking medications for bipolar disorder and schizophrenia etc strongly disagree with that. It’s real!

While thinking long and hard about this,  I stopped by my MLA's office and asked MLA Gary Burrill and his constituency staff for advice on this!

Among the community of people I advocate for, it is believed that there are things that the government can do address social isolation if the government was interested. And in terms of funding programs or providing money for social events, that is true. I spoke to Gary Burrill, Leader of the NSNDP. and his community staff, and they agreed with me that repairing a friendship is not something an MLA Office can help with, and an MLA, or their office, cannot get involved.

This article illustrates yet another whole side to social isolation and points out the following factors:

• Money is hardly ever available in a welfare recipient’s budget to go out and participate in social activities that have a cost.

• Many welfare recipients do not have good relationships with friends or family because their past friends believe in the Stigma about welfare recipients including them.

• Things like attending Church, AA meetings and getting seen in the QE#2 Emerg are all free, however, you have to consider “Why attend Church when religion is not something you are interested in? Or “Why attend AA meetings when you are not an Alcoholic?” and Why Go to the QE#2 Emerg when their is not Medical Complaint?

• The answer is that it is because welfare recipients need to take advantage of anything affordable to get out of their apartments and socialize with others.

As I mentioned above, I spoke this week to a community mental health advocate and she was adamant:  “People in your community have got to understand that people do need to cancel plans due to social anxiety – it is real! They have got to stop believing that anxiety is fake. I know it is frustrating that they do not have other friends/social contacts with which to make plans. Still, cancelling plans because of anxiety is not fake. It is real and common.“

Social Isolation affects other people, not just welfare recipients. People have asked me - What about those who cannot get out because of disabilities or our large population of Seniors?

Here is something that sheds more light on the Social Isolation topic https://www.who.int/teams/social-determinants-of-health/demographic-change-and-healthy-ageing/social-isolation-and-loneliness.

I focus on welfare recipients experiencing social isolation because many are young, and I am sure that as you readers can figure out, when the standard house hold rate is $950.00 a month, and after a welfare recipient’s rent and bills are paid, there is next to nothing left to go out and socialize. But many people – the public and professionals - do not seem to understand how the system itself is encouraging social isolation.

Having a larger allowance to live on, for example the $2000 a month people got on CERB during the first COVID restrictions, definitely helped reduce Social isolation. But in addition to raising Income Assistance rates, the government also needs to start investing into programs like Social Prescriptions.

Lets hope that something that professionals can refer the lonely and friendless – all forms of social isolation - to for making new friends, will someday become available.

https://healthyplacesbydesign.org/socially-connected-communities-solutions-for-social-isolation/