A “where is she at, now?” story

 By Kendall Worth!

Sometimes in life, whether we are rich or poor, we never know when we might run into someone we know. Sadly, for welfare recipients, this could include running into someone who is a believer in the stigma about income assistance and it’s clients. 

 

I have written in the past, about this for the Nova Scotia Advocate: here and here which specifically provide examples of the topic I am addressing. Since unexpectedly running to Dorothy in the mall, we got together for her to give me an update on her situation.

In this story, I bring you another example, but on a brighter note when you run into someone when you least expect it. In a local shopping centre, 3 or 4 weeks ago, I ran into Dorothy (not her real name) who I had previously written about. I also checked in on her when COVID Lock-Downs and Restrictions began, and, along with some others checked in again just before Christmas 2020. I check on Dorothy and some others because they are among the majority of unlucky welfare recipients, who live a socially isolated life without support.

Dorothy told me that the overall experience of living day-to-day with COVID Lock-Downs and Public Health Measures/restrictions, has taught her that she has got to get herself out there more, and make better connections with society and the world. As one of the articles above outlines, one of Dorothy’s main social contacts is with her ex boyfriend.

“Dorothy remains good friends with her old boyfriend, and his new girlfriend. Dorothy and the new girlfriend have been on hikes together.

Now  all three of them are going to be spending the Christmas holidays together, and Dorothy is looking forward to that.”

But recently, at our get together, she told me that although she had a good friendship with her ex-boyfriend and got to know his new girlfriend, the minute all COVID restrictions and public health measures were lifted, she decided she no longer wants to depend on their friendship to keep herself from being socially isolated. She told me that starting in March 2021 she began putting limits on how often she would get-to-gether and hangout with them. She said “Kendall, the three of us always hanging out together was a welcome break during COVID restrictions because we had each other for support when thing were not normal.” Then she went on to say “Kendall, as public health measures were lifting, we felt like we were getting into an inappropriate threesome.” Then she told me, while giving me this current update: “This was when the decision was made that even though we still want to be friends who care about each, we want to limit contact and limit how often we see each other.” Then, she said to me “Kendall, I also decided that our decision is all about respecting the fact that the two of them are in a serious romantic relationship and they want their relationship, as a couple, to be respected. If respect means returning to the social isolation I experienced before COVID, I will do so.”

Dorothy also told me unlike her life before COVID she is actually making plans and taking steps to not have to go back to living a life of social isolation. She said “Right now my goal is to look for a job, and if I do not find employment I asm going to look at ging back to school.” Then she made the point, “Kendall, I am not even 30 years old yet, I cannot count on meeting eligibility to receive the upcoming federal Disability Benefit, if it ever passes, and I want to at least try, and do everything I can, to get out of this situation.” Then she made the point “Unlike most people I have got to know through standing in line at the Food Bank, and hanging out at the Soup-Kitchens, I do not have any drug addictions that negatively affect my life and well-being.”

I asked about what she had been doing post COVID restrictions. She told me that the first thing she did was to get her resume updated. Then she started going out and applying for Jobs. Then, after applying for several jobs, she got an interview, but she did not get the job, got frustrated and gave up. On the day that I saw her in the mall, however, she was passing through the Mall on her way to her first Job Interview since she started job searching again in March of 2021. She started looking for work in March of 2021 and got her first interview in Nov 2022? That is quite a stretch of time. I should let you know she did not get the Job she had the interview for in November. She then said to me “Kendall, I am not giving up but at the same time I am prepared to live life knowing and understanding that getting off of Income Assistance may only ever be a dream for me.” 

The other thing she brought to my attention during this interview about her updated story, is, there was a recent occasion when she had to be out of her apartment for a couple of weeks, because the landlord did not want to evict her, but some renovations needed to be done. Very few landlords do this but her landlord paid to put her up in a hotel for three weeks during renovations. When she moved back into her apartment it looked a lot nicer with all new appliances. Her rent went up from $550.00 to $750.00 but still within affordable range. Also she brought to my attention that she is getting a housing subsidy of $200.00 a month so what she has to live on has not changed.

The final piece of news in this update about Dorothy, is that, if she doesn't find a job soon, then she will consider going back to school. She is looking into Community Collage, but because she has not got an Academic grade 12 Diploma means she cannot attend University.

I wish Dorothy all the best moving forward and it was nice crossing paths with her, again!