An example of what “knowing all too well” could look like...

 By Kendall Worth

What stigma can feel like... 

Alleluia, is, of course, NOT her Real name! Alleluia has chosen this name, to ensure that it will be difficult for people,  like her sisters, for example, to see it is about her. They will not even speak to her anymore. Her sisters are both married to strong Christian “believers” and all four of them do not speak to her, firstly, because she is on Income Assistance. If Alleluia went public with her story using her real name, she risks getting harassed to get off of Income Assistance, both by them, and others, who she has not spoken to in long time. The harassment she will receive will be a repeat of the issues addressed in this article, from the now-folded Nova Scotia Advocate. See here, for more on the stigma, she and others fear they will be faced with, if they use their real names.

During our interview, Alleluia explained that she knows all too well what it is like to live, feeling like you are supposed to be an introvert, even though in Alleluia’s case, it is not naturally occurring, but results from social and economic circumstances. I wrote recently, here and here about this and during our interview Alleluia told me that she could relate to these specific blog posts on what it can be like to have been forced into becoming an Introvert by your personal Social and Economic Circumstances, using 2 different angles.

Alleluia is alone almost 95% of the time, other than appointments with professionals like doctors, psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers and counsellors. She tries to limit how often she goes to places like Souls Harbour, Hope Cottage, etc. because her experience is that many people do not respect her personal boundaries. For instance, people would join her at a table, which was fine, but did not mean that she wanted to be friends with them. Alleluia herself told me she strongly relates to this blog post, because it relates to her circumstances. As soon as Alleluia turned 19 years old, and her Mom had already passed, her father’s health started to go down hill. So Alleluia and her 2 sisters had to move out of their childhood home. Long story short: all the money that was in her family at that point in her life, and money that came from the sale of the house, had to go to her Dad’s care. Her father passed a few years later.

Alleluia is not alone. Many of my interviews have been with people living in poverty who tell me that they stopped or dread going to places like soup kitchens, because they have to sit and interact with strangers, or people with whom they do not feel comfortable. What is the solution? Well it goes back to the Need for a Social Prescription Program.

Now, Regarding Alleluia!

Alleluia is a 40 year old women who has been on Income Assistance since she was 19 years old – the last 31 years of her life. As a kid, growing up, she had learning disabilities, ADHD, and issues dealing with depression and anxiety. Also she has a pinched nerve. When Alleluia first moved into her apartment at 19 years, the rent then was only $535.00 and she has been in the same apartment for 31 years. Her rent has gone up twice and both times it was long before the rent cap came into affect in 2021. Today her rent is $900.00 a month.

$900.00 a month with Heat, Hot-water and power all inclusive may sound like a sweet deal, but really it is not.

She receives the enhanced Standard House Hold Rate of $1,022 a month plus the $324.00 Disability Supplement, $81.00 for 3 Special Diets, and $40.00 for Telephone. This = $1467.00 a month to live on. She is being told she cannot qualify for a rental subsidy because the apartment she rents is in the basement of someone’s home. After $900.00 all utilities included, is subtracted from $1467.00 = $567.00 Left over. Then $40.00 out of that $567.00 goes directly on her phone. So Subtract $40.00 from $567.00 = $527.00. Then, after she spends another $400.00 on groceries, personal hygiene products and other basic needs, she has $127.00 left to get through the month. With inflation the way it is these days, $127.00 does not always cut it. $20.00 a month come out of that $127.00 for a once a month cab ride home from the Grocery Story. That is really $107.00 a month she has left. Something always comes up, using the remaining $107.00, including having coffee while she is waiting for appointments. In addition, from that $107.00, she has one day per month where she has to go to the hospital for a full day of medical appointments. On that day approx $25.00 out of that $107.00 goes to eat and get coffee at the hospital cafeteria.

Anyway during the interview we talked about her desire to gain more stability, within her level of poverty. She asked me how can I be more social and have more stability, when, after rent and bills are paid, the money is not enough to go out and socialize? She told me that she use to be involved with churches at 2 different times in her life. She stop going to those Churches because people asked her questions, like why she does not have a full-time job. When she told people it was none of their business there was push back and rising stigma. During this interview she pointed out this BLOG post were I describe two groups of people, and tells me she feels like she is in a combination of Group 1 and Group 2. She is feeling this way because she is alone 90% of the time. At the same time she does keep her appointments with Professionals.

She told me that while she is spending her days alone in her apartment, she keep her self busy by reading, drawing and watching TV. She does go to the library once a week. Unfortunately, she feels she is at a dead-end.

Lets Find a Solution! For more on what a solution could look like, See this BLOG post  

 

 

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 Kendall Worth is an award-winning anti-poverty activist who lives with disabilities and tries to make ends meet on income assistance.