By Kendall Worth
In the past I reported on a member of my community named Bob, here. In a nut shell, Bob had a recent experience, where he could have used a non-professional Friendship Peer Support Worker as described in this blog post.
First, I want to specifically remind you about some things: Members of the financially-better-off-community have a lot of stigma against, and judgment of people who are living day-to-day life on Income Assistance. I have published many articles on the issue. Every individual story is different, but some income assistance recipients have friends, or family members who they keep in touch with, and who do not judge them, or they have non stigma-applying acquaintances, beyond folks they run into at soup kitchens and food banks.
In 4 blog posts, here, here and here, and here, I attempt to provide evidence for my otherwise unproven assumption that approx 80% of income assistance recipients in the community I advocate for, live lives of loneliness and social isolation. 20%, or so, in my estimation, do have friends and family members -- people who do not believe in the stigma about them. In the last linked post above, I also provide a clear description of the difference between the 80% unlucky, isolated recipient, and a 20% lucky one with community or family friends.
Bob considers himself to be a split between the two, and this paragraph explains why. Bob has experienced the welfare stigma, and people making decisions to end their friendship with him, because they react negatively, to his learning disabilities and OCD. He has been accused of overstepping boundaries in friendships, then, as reported in my BLOG post dated January 10, 2026 he received an “Autism Diagnosis”. Anyway, he feels he is part of the unlucky 80%, because, in his case, he has people who knew from his past and is no longer friends with, because they are stigma believers, and, he also has people within his family who are also believers in the stigma about income assistance recipients, and they would harass him, if they knew, for disclosing his recent Autism Diagnosis. He also feels he is part of the lucky 20% because he does have people, in his life who he connects with through volunteer work he does in his community, who behave like they are non stigma believers and who support him and want to see his situation get better. I am not talking about professionals but people outside of that. Bob feels lucky that way, in that he acknowledges that many people especially the ones who are part of the unlucky 80%, only have those professionals in their lives, that do want to see them do better.
So, in today’s update, I want to report on the fact that Bob finally has an appointment coming up with Autism Nova Scotia. He held off for most of the winter from making that appointment because he needed time himself to accept his unexpected diagnosis. However, a situation about a month ago prompted him to finally make this appointment to see someone at Autism Nova Scotia.
About a month ago a couple of people he gets together with for coffee, or to watch movies or go for walks with… made the decision to end their friendship with him and accused him of overstepping boundaries. Bob did not want to disclose the the details of their reasoning but he did say, it was hurtful to Bob is as part of their final conversations, (and before they set the boundary) to tell Bob not to contact them anymore. Their final Words, to Bob, Disability gets no free pass.
At his next appointment with the professionals like doctors, psychiatrists, psychologist, social workers, and counsellors, (who as we all know cannot be his new friends, he cannot meet for coffee or go for walks with, moving forward, because the Code of Ethics and professional boundaries they have to follow) and told them during those follow-up doctors and counselling appointments what has happened, they prompted him to make that appointment with Autism soon.
Bob is going to attend that upcoming appointment at Autism Nova Scotia soon, knowing and understanding that, because the person he is meeting with, is also a professional who has to follow the Code of Ethics, they are not going to able to be a new friend, who he can meet for coffee or watch a movie, either.
Something has got to be done to stop encouraging people who are in Bob’s situation that social isolation is OK.
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